Actual exchange this morning while out with my dog.
Other: “Wow. she’s really showing her age. How old is she?”
Me: “Uh…Seven.”
Other: “Yeah. That’s about as long as they live. Oh, well.”
Me:
I say nothing..aloud. If I said what was going through my head at the moment I’m pretty certain that Other’s head would have exploded. Instead I patted my dog and turned back towards the house. In my head, aside from the tirade of profanity that was creeping up my collar, I was thinking, I hope like hell she never volunteers to be a grief counselor. So not helping.
I’ve known Other for a couple decades and there hasn’t been any signs of dementia or other disorder that might cause her to blurt out any unfiltered thought that pops into her head. That leaves one conclusion. Terminal rudeness.
Imagine this line of thinking if we adjust the scenario with one exchanged detail…
Me: “Wow, your mom’s really showing her age. How old is she now?”
Other: “Eighty nine.”
Me: Shaking my head on an exhale. “Yeah, that’s about as long as they live. Oh, well.”
You see the problem. Apparently, on her planet, ours was a normal exchange. I don’t want to live on her planet. I don’t even want to visit there.
I know my dog is getting older. I know Great Danes don’t have as long a life as smaller dogs. No shit, Sherlock. Just let me bathe in the bubble of *happy dog time* that I do have… And I swear to god, if you say one rude thing after she’s gone, I am egging your house on the hottest day of the year.
There. I feel better. Now, THAT helped.
Word Ninja Girl 